Adolescents make resolutions too. When is the last time you asked what they wish to do differently in the new year? Many of our clients wish to be more in control of their emotions, but have a fear of rejection, of not being good enough, of not doing it right, of losing control... In The Good Dinosaur, Arlo's dad told him, "Sometimes you have to get through your fear to see the beauty on the other side." Watch this clip and ask the following questions.
- Have you ever been afraid of trying, doing, or saying something and found the results of facing the fear were beautiful? Tell about it.
- Can you think of time some helped you face your fear? Who and what was the situation?
- What is a fear you want to face in 2016? Who can you get to help you?
- What do you imagine it will be like once you have faced your fear?
In the movie, Arlo really wanted to make his mark on the family silo as his parents and siblings did. However, he was smaller and full of anxiety, so he struggled to do enough to make his mark.
- What is one remarkable change you want to make this year? Describe why it is important to you.
- What is an obstacle to you making your mark (reaching your goal)?
- What do you fear will happen if you do or do not change?
- Arlo had to learn skills along the way to finally see his internal strength. What skills do you need to learn and what strengths do you have that will help you reach your goal?
It is important to let your adolescent know fear of change can be normal and if things do not go according to plans, it is always okay to keep trying. With each try they become better at a skill and closer to making the desired change. Practice does not make perfect, it makes better. Sometimes talking about and imagining the beauty on the other side is enough to take the next step.